Testimonials

stories of hope from children and parents

 

Dear ChildSafe,

On a late Saturday evening, the darkest shadow was cast on our family by the news that our child was sexually assaulted by a family member. It was a dagger through my heart. I could not believe what my son was telling me. I was appalled at what my niece had done to my son. All I could do was cry and hug my Patrick. I felt like I had failed to protect him and failed as a mother. After the police came, I took him to CHRISTUS Santa Rosa Children's Hospital where they did a sexual assault exam. As we headed home, my tears turned to anger. More anger than I'd ever felt in my life.

 

The next few days were the toughest. Patrick felt that he was to blame for what had happened. He didn't want to go to school in fear that SHE-his abuser-would be there. Or her family. He was afraid to tell me that he didn't feel safe and afraid the abuser would be allowed to come into our home again. He was scared to be alone. I was making his favorite sugar cookies and he was frightened to be in the dining room while I was in the kitchen. His fear tore my soul apart.

 

Then came the day for our forensic interview at ChildSafe. We met a CPS worker and a SAPD detective at ChildSafe. As Patrick went in for the interview, I met with Ricki, our ChildSafe advocate. She explained the process to me and described the services that my son and our family would receive. Then she asked me what happened. The tears came as I talked and Ricki listened. But when we were through I could almost smile and I felt assured that Patrick would get help.

 

A few weeks later, Patrick had his follow-up medical exam at ChildSafe. The nurse was terrific. She explained what she was doing, and why, and how. When Patrick mentioned to the nurse he was afraid THOSE people might come to ChildSafe, she told him that THOSE people are not allowed to come to ChildSafe. He relaxed, started talking to her, and became comfortable about the process.

 

Shortly after that we started therapy at ChildSafe. It wasn't easy. But our therapist, Mr. Henry, never forced Patrick to talk. Henry assured Patrick that he wouldn't force him to do anything. That all he wanted to know was Patrick's feelings about what happened. By the third week of therapy, Patrick was in better shape than I was. I know because that was the week Patrick told me it broke his heart to see me cry. He told me he would be okay. So I promised not to cry unless they were happy tears. And it was an easier promise to keep as I saw Patrick recovering. His fear was being replaced by smiles. He could go into a room by himself. And he was talking more about how he felt about what had happened.

 

We've been going to ChildSafe every week for the past seven months. You have been a Godsend for our family. The healing process takes time and you have never rushed us. I can't imagine going through this without them. ChildSafe has never let us down. You gave me back my son's wonderful personality. You gave him the strength to say "I am a survivor, I am not a victim." Those are the bravest words I've ever heard. And ChildSafe made them possible. Thank you-from my heart-for your care of Patrick and for your care of all the children in the city who need your help.

 

Forever grateful,
Marietta

 

All names in this letter have been changed to protect the privacy of our clients.